Edward Francis Donohue.
October 3rd 1929 – November 20th 2007.
It was the funeral of a good friend’s father. Hundreds packed the St. Catharine Roman Catholic Church on a cold wintry morning to pay their last respects. In the front pews sat his loving wife of 53 years, 5 grown children accompanied by respective spouses, and a myriad of adoring and bereft grandchildren, tears silently falling from each and every face.
Funerals are always sad but they also provide a remarkable opportunity to look death straight in the face while pondering the true meaning of our own lives.
The loss of this distinguished man was palpable. Mr. Donohue was a devoted father, loving husband, lifelong friend, doting grandfather, exceptional businessman, patriot, and a lover of the arts, education, religion, and world travel.
Mixed in with the heartbreak was also absolute celebration for a man who derived fun and significance in the ordinary moments of a day; a man who loved to sing and dance and tell a gentleman’s joke; a man who remembered your name and was always glad to see you; a man who understood not to take things too seriously even though life was serious business.
But something else happened that morning at the church.
As the stories and the tributes to Mr. Donohue’s life began to emerge, those who had gathered to remember him knew they were in the presence of something special. With each passing word, life lessons were being taught that were so profound and important, you could not help but be transformed by the accounts of what this man had done with his 78 years.
It was not the big things that were ultimately impressive; his noteworthy financial success, achievements and accolades, or his ability to rise out of the mire of a childhood spent during the Great Depression. Instead, it was his personal philosophy regarding integrity, truth and life standards that, in fact, defined him as “one of a kind”.
The things he believed in took commitment and discipline and sacrifice, but he was willing to invest in all three. He knew that reaching for ideals in daily life was difficult, but he also considered it a necessary and practical element of a life well lived.
Following are the lessons that Edward Francis Donohue left behind for all of our benefit. His children, grandchildren and friends gave the following testimony to the man they admired and the man who had cemented for them the value of honorable conduct.
Respect the sanctity of marriage: How easy it is on those bright, hopeful days of a wedding to say your vows. Full of glee and champagne and hope of a bright future - we all mean them. But working them out day-by-day, through the hills and valleys of marital and family life takes endurance and commitment. To be on your deathbed, with love and reverence in your heart for your bride of 53 years, and be able to say, “till death do us part” …that is another matter entirely.
If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all. Words can build up or words can destroy. Choose what you say carefully and be a person that contributes to the esteem of others. Mr. Donohue made a life decision to not take part in gossip, slander or disparaging remarks when speaking of another person.
Love and serve your country. Mr. Donohue was awarded the American Flag at his burial for sacrifice and service rendered. Imagine for a moment the courage it takes to be willing to die for your country. It is sacred distinction.
Glorify God. Invest in weekly church attendance, prayer, and caring for those less fortunate. Spend time getting to know your part in Divine purpose.
Get a good education. There is so much to learn and so many great teachers. Gain knowledge and dedicate yourself to higher education at all levels because it will serve you for a lifetime.
Make sure everyone is included. Rally around those people who aren’t the winners in life. Mr. Donohue made it his mission to continue to care for the widows of his friends that had passed on. He went door to door at baseball season and found the little boy who couldn’t swing a bat and put him on the team anyway. He rallied around those who didn’t have the confidence to pull themselves up and out of bad situations. He believed in embracing all people.
Care about what your friends care about. Remember the names and birthdays of your friends’ children; stay in touch with people who are close to you; show up when invited - even when you don’t feel like it, not because it is important to you, but because it is important to them.
Put your best foot forward. Dress well and look your best. First impressions are no soon forgotten and you never know who will cross your path. Mr. Donohue greeted the day with a smile on his face and a zest for living in his heart.
Be happy for other people’s success.
It’s true what they say about it being lonely at the top. So celebrate when others do well. Be delighted for them and then wish the same for yourself.
Admire Individuality. Edward loved the variation of people in the world. Where others shied away from differences, he found them irresistible. He asserted that you could find joy and interest in every person you meet because he knew there was vast treasure hidden there.
Finally, life is a gift. So treat it that way and it will respond in kind.
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They say the greatest contribution a man can make is the people he leaves behind. As all of us headed home that November afternoon, we felt uplifted, inspired and grateful that this exceptional man had been part of our liv
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